The Lois Lerner Defense
By Mark
Steyn
We have the president of the United States’ word as a gentleman that he
knew nothing about the Internal Revenue Service’s targeting of his enemies
until he “learned about it from the same news reports that I think most people
learned about this.”
Furthermore, although the commissioner of the IRS, Douglas Shulman,
visited Obama’s White House no fewer than 157 times, which is 156 times more
than his predecessor Mark Everson ever visited the White House, we know that
this was for legitimate Easter-egg rolls, as he testified to Congress, and
meetings to discuss Obamacare. The Easter Bunny, one should note, visits the
White House two to four times as often as the average IRS commissioner did
before Mr. Shulman came along. But you can’t make a health-care omelet without
breaking Easter eggs: It is one of the many distinctive features of Obama-style
“health” “care” “reform” that, while it has not led to the hiring of a single
additional doctor, nurse, or hospital janitor, it did require the biggest
expansion of the IRS since the Second World War. So, when he wasn’t rolling
Easter eggs and advising the moppets on whether they needed to declare the
luxury Belgian white chocolate balls with praline filling, he was participating
in vital meetings on how many extra SWAT teams he was going to need to enforce
the new colonoscopy non-compliance penalty.
Let us
also overlook the excellent treatment received from the IRS by members of the
president’s family. Although acting commissioner Steven Miller apologized for
the “horrible customer service” conservative taxpayers had gotten, a gentleman
by the name of Malik Obama received impeccable, express service when he took
the precaution of mailing in his non-profit application from N’giya, Kenya,
rather than notoriously slower mail processing centers such as Phoenix and
Dallas. Malik, the brother of President Obama, runs the Barack H. Obama
Foundation, named for the president’s father. On May 30, 2011, they applied for
tax-exempt status, and had their approval signed less than a month later by
Lois Lerner herself, and conveniently backdated by Lois to cover the
two-and-a-half years the enterprising Malik had already been raking in
“tax-deductible” donations from Americans.
Whatever. Let’s take it as read that, when U.S. taxpayers wind up giving
tax breaks to an entity linked to the butchers of Darfur, it’s pure coincidence
that the racket turns out to be run by the president’s brother. Let’s accept
that Malik Obama just got lucky that his letter landed on the desk of Lois
Lerner, and that, when she backdated his application for two-and-a-half years,
she’d momentarily forgotten that it’s illegal for her to backdate it more than
two-and-a-quarter years. Indeed, let’s take the president at his word that the
existence of this shadowy IRS entity working deep within the even shadowier
U.S. Treasury planted in deep cover within the shadowiest conspiracy of them
all, this murky hitherto unknown organization called “the Executive Branch,”
that all this was news to him. What that means then is not that this or that
elected politician is corrupt but that the government of the United States is
corrupt.
There seems to be ever more evidence for that. Every day brings
revelations that the IRS conservative crackdown went way beyond the Tea Party.
McClatchy Newspapers reports that a woman known only as “Ms. Richards” in the
Cincinnati office of the IRS told Coalition for Life of Iowa that their
application for nonprofit status could only be approved if they signed a letter
promising not to picket in front of Planned Parenthood. Mark Drabik, a military
veteran, became politically active and started giving to conservative groups
only to have the IRS challenge his church donations. Catherine Engelbrecht
founded True the Vote to protect ballot integrity, and within a few months her
family’s business, farm, and personal taxes had all attracted IRS audits.
Hundreds and hundreds of groups were consigned to the purgatory of “pending” —
a term for IRS customers not as favored as Malik Obama can stretch leisurely
from six months to ten to twenty to thirty, and beyond. When the most lavishly
funded government on the planet comes after you, eventual guilt or innocence is
irrelevant: The process is the punishment.
I am an
immigrant to this great land, and I love it, but I will make a small
observation from my years in the United States which I hope won’t be taken the
wrong way: Like citizens of almost all Western democracies in the 21st century,
Americans are overly deferential to bureaucracy, but, in my observation, they
are uniquely fearful of the state’s tax collectors to a degree I have never
seen with Her Majesty’s Revenue & Customs in London or equivalent agencies
in Paris, Ottawa, Rome, Canberra. The IRS has, in American terms, extraordinary
powers. It was, for example, amusing to see Lois Lerner plead the Fifth
Amendment and exercise her constitutional right not to put herself at risk of
self-incrimination. As the great Walter Williams pointed out the other day,
every single American waives his Fifth Amendment rights every time he signs
that tax return on April 15. Americans are fearless if some guy pulls some
stunt in a shopping mall, but an IRS assault is brutal and unending. Many
activists faded away, and the media began writing stories about how the Tea
Party had peaked; they were over; they wouldn’t be a factor in 2012. And so it
proved. As Rush Limbaugh pointed out the other day, the plan worked.
But, of course, there was no plan, was there? So let’s take Obama at his
word that he had no idea all this was going on. In that case, he might like to
take the lead in calling for the abolition of a corrupt agency and its
grotesque tax code, and their replacement by a bureaucracy with more limited
powers commensurate with a free society and a simplified tax regime with lower
rates and thus fewer bewildering, mercurial “exemptions” that make the
citizenry dependent on the caprices of Ms. Lerner and her colleagues. That’s a
prize worth fighting for. In the meantime, the next time the IRS call you up
with demands for this and demands for that, simply tell them, “I am filing the
Lois Lerner defense,” and then say as she did to Congress “I have not done
anything wrong. And I will not answer any questions.” Every man his own Lois
Lerner!
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